My Dying Wish
by Ukyou Kuonji
Summary: Perhaps the only feasible way for Ukyou to win Ranma... but it is a Pyrrhic victory


Ukyou Kuonji: I wrote this story as I reminisced about a friend   
of mine who had died thirteen years before, as a sort of homage.   
The bulk of it was written down in the course of a single day.   
My online mentor claimed that I had "bitten off more okonomi-yaki   
than [I] could chew," but I submitted it to the FFML regardless.  
The response was tremendous for one of my first pieces, and I still  
regard it highly to this day.  
  
It has now been fourteen years since I lost my friend, and a full  
year has passed since I first submitted this story. Since there   
have been a few rewrites and repostings to hit the list lately,  
I thought I'd revive this one, and see if it still has the power  
it had when I first made...  
  
  
MY DYING WISH  
a Ranma 1/2 fanfiction by Ukyou Kuonji  
all characters are the property of Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan &c  
No infringement is intended  
  
This story is for somewhat mature audiences. There is some sex and   
yes, someone dies in this story. So you've been warned.  
  
  
Everyone has left the hospice room where I have been lying for the  
past two weeks. They've said their final goodbyes, and departed.  
  
Everyone, that is, except my husband, Ranma.  
  
"Ucchan.. can you feel anything?" I nod, and smile weakly. I wish   
I could respond more to him, instead of simply lying here, feeling   
him thrust into me one last time. Still, I consider myself fortunate   
at this point to be able to merely feel him. Hell, I consider myself   
fortunate to even *have* him here. I may be dying, but I am a lucky   
woman nonetheless.  
  
***  
  
I don't think I had been to see a doctor since I was born. My   
family was too poor when I was a child, even before my dowry was   
stolen. Good doctors were few and far between in rural Kansai,  
anyway. But business was good at the Ucchan those days, and I   
figured I could afford to get myself checked out. Besides, I   
hadn't been feeling my best, lately. Sure, I could sling my   
spatula with the best of 'em; why, I could still beat Shampoo   
in a fair fight (emphasis on 'fair' -- the little hussy doesn't   
know the meaning of the word. Or a lot of others, for that matter).   
But something told me I ought to get myself looked at. Maybe it   
was women's intuition.  
  
Maybe I'd gone too long denying that intuition.   
  
***  
  
I thought it might take a couple of hours, and I'd be back at the  
restaurant by early afternoon. Konatsu was getting to be a pretty   
good cook, but he still needed help as far as the business side of   
the operation was concerned.  
But they kept me there nearly all day, and I started to get concerned.   
Finally, one of the doctors came out.  
  
"Well, Miss Kuonji... we have some of the results of your lab work.   
We'd like you to come back in a couple of days. We're going to have   
to do a biopsy."  
"A biopsy? What's the matter?"  
"Well..." I didn't like the sound of that pause. "Your mammogram   
showed several abnormalities in both of your breasts. We're not sure   
if there's a tumor in either, and if so, whether it's malignant or   
benign..."  
  
***  
  
Malignancy.  
Cancer.  
For ten years I had denied the fact that I was even a woman, and   
now here I had breast cancer.  
  
I couldn't believe it. Just when things started to look as if they  
would turn around, this had to happen.  
  
My life had been misery all the time I was seeking after Ranma and   
Genma Saotome. My heart could hold nothing but hatred. Hatred for   
the two men who had stolen my dowry and abandoned me by the side of   
the road. Hatred for my gullible father, who gave the yatai away   
*before* Ran-chan and I were married, and yet threw me out of the   
house when I tried to return home -- as if it had been *my* fault.  
Hatred for my female form, which left me too weak to fight or chase   
the Saotomes, and left me a third-class citizen: a dowerless female   
is among the lowest of the low. I channelled this energy into my   
craft, my okonomi-yaki, and eventually was able to surpass my father   
in skill. Not that he would ever be aware of it.  
Then, after ten years, I caught up with the Saotomes. And I   
discovered Ran-chan was unaware of the bargain his father had   
reneged on. He even liked me! Thought I was pretty (well, "cute,"  
anyway)! How could I possibly hate him? I even had a pretty good   
chance at snaring him, now. His then-fiancee, Akane Tendo was a   
nice enough girl by herself, but with Ranma around, the two of them   
were like oil and water. So I set up shop in the Nerima district   
where they lived, and decided to bide my time until he was ready to   
commit to me instead of her.  
  
And now, Fate had decided to play its cruelest joke of all on me.   
I would never have the chance to make him mine.  
  
***  
  
The walk back home from my second doctor's appointment was the   
longest trip I had ever taken in my life. I could hear children  
laughing as I went; but to me it only seemed as if it were directed  
at me, mocking me for all the hopes and dreams I'd had that were  
now all for nothing. The afternoon rains came, and while others  
quickly brought out umbrellas or scurried for cover, I just stood  
there, in the middle of the street, letting myself get drenched.  
Maybe I was hoping to drown myself then and there, but I just lifted  
my face to the sky and opened my mouth in a soundless scream at the  
heavens as they continued to add insult to injury after injury.  
A policeman's whistle brought me back to my senses, and I resumed  
my trudge back to the Ucchan. I could feel the weight of the world  
itself bearing down upon my shoulders as I unbolted the door (Konatsu  
had left a note on the door stating that he had gone out to buy   
groceries).  
On the other hand, maybe it was just my spatula.  
Once inside, I unsheathed it and set the blade down on the floor,  
and I rested heavily on the handle. Nope, the weight on my shoulders  
was still there. All at once, I realized I was using my spatula as   
I might a crutch or a cane. Had I aged fifty years in the span of   
a one-mile walk?  
I let go of my makeshift crutch, and it fell to the floor with a  
loud clang. I found a chair, and dropped myself into it.  
At which point the chair itself dropped with a pained grunt.  
  
I found myself sprawled on the floor next to what might appear to  
be a young schoolgirl dressed as one of my chairs. I didn't feel up  
to responding the way I usually do, though, so I decided to talk   
my way out of the situation.  
"Tsubasa... why don't you just go home? I really don't feel up to  
this, okay?"  
He blinked. "Ukyou-sama... you're not gonna clobber me with that   
thing? What's the matter? Please, tell me... maybe I can help you."  
Him? Help me? What a laugh. But what else was there?  
So I told him...  
  
"...and you know something, Tsu-chan? It's not like I haven't had  
to deal with bad news before. I could've even dealt with Ran-chan   
getting married to Akane-chan. I could always have some hope that   
he and I might both outlive her, so we could at least spend our   
twilight years together. Old friends, now lovers, walking hand   
in hand off into the sunset of our lives.  
"It's not gonna happen that way, Tsu-chan... Nothing's gonna   
happen to me, except..." and I just choked off. I didn't want   
to cry, especially not in front of Tsubasa. But I couldn't help   
it. It just wasn't fair! And here I am, pouring my heart out   
to a creepy transvestite with a crush on me.  
  
He patted my hand, gently. "I know how you feel, Ukyou-sama."  
What?!  
I stood up, furious at this impertinence. "No, you *don't*, you  
little crossdressing BAKA! Don't you get it?! I'm DYING. This is  
it, the end of the road, time's up! I'm not gonna get the chances  
I deserve..."  
He held up his hands, trying to shield himself. "I know that,   
Ukyou-sama! Please, hear me out!" All right. Fine. Two minutes.  
I sat down again. "I realize I can't know what you're going   
through as far as actually dying, okay? But I'm losing my chance  
here, too. I know it sounds selfish, Ukyou-sama, but now I won't  
be able to convince you of my feelings for you, any more than   
you'll have your chance at Ranma.  
"In fact, you've got a better shot at Ranma than I do at you. If  
it's gonna be this clear that Ranma and Akane are gonna outlive you,  
you could at least try to take Akane's place in your little dream.  
Maybe it'll even work."  
His gaze fell to the floor. "I know I'll never be able to change   
your opinion of me..."  
I looked at him in wonder. What a brilliant idea. "Tsubasa...   
I think you just did."  
  
***  
  
So there I was, setting at the Tendo's table, trying to explain  
Tsubasa's little plan in my own words.  
"You want to WHAT?!" Akane was indignant at the suggestion, as I   
expected.  
"I want to marry Ran-chan. I'd just be borrowing him, Akane-chan.."  
She had her hands on her hips, with a 'this-better-be-good'   
expression on her face. "'Borrowing' him," she stated, archly.  
"Look, Akane-chan. You're not ready to marry Ran-chan.."  
"READY TO... Are you kidding? I'm NEVER marrying that pervert!"  
"My point exactly. But I imagine that someday you'll change that   
tune of yours. For myself, I certainly want to marry him. Right   
away. I don't have any time to waste. Please, Akane-chan, can I   
have your permission? It won't be for more than a year..."  
"What makes me think I'll get him back from you?" she demanded.   
Poor girl, she never understood how much she loved him. Jealousy   
wasn't the best expression of love I could think of, but it certainly   
made lie of all her protestations that she hated him. "How do I   
know you won't just spirit him away from here the moment you get   
the chance?!"  
"Have I ever tried that? I'm sure if I wanted to, I could. And   
would have, already. He's still here, right? So, you know I'm not  
about to take him away from you for good. Besides I need to stay   
here in Nerima now."  
"Yeah? Well, what's marriage, if not taking him away for good?   
And why do you *have* to stay, anyway?"  
"Akane-chan, does the word 'widower' mean anything to you?"  
Now she quit yelling. "Hunh?"   
"Akane-chan, I'm dying." That stopped her cold.  
  
"Ukyou... I- I'm sorry."  
  
I nodded. "Yeah, they're giving me six months, a year at best.   
So, you'll have him back soon, I can assure you. And hey -- this   
way, old man Saotome can fulfill *both* engagements. Isn't that   
cool?" I flashed what I hoped would be a winning smile at her.  
She looked at me, quizzically. "How can you be so cheerful about  
this, Ukyou?"  
I stared down at the table and tried to think of an answer to that.  
"I don't know. I guess I've jumped to the acceptance stage faster   
than most people do. The thought of making Ran-chan my husband   
helps sweeten it, too."  
She shuddered at my calling Ran-chan 'husband.' She wasn't quite   
ready to accept that. "Well, what makes you think he'll say 'yes',   
Ukyou?"  
"Well... I'm his friend."  
"Yeah -- but that's hardly enough."  
"No? Don't you think a husband and wife should really be the best   
of friends? I would think that's an excellent formula for a happy   
marriage. What do you remember about your parents, Akane-chan?"  
"Well, yeah... but I mean, he only sees you as a friend. Not a   
marriage partner."  
I smiled gently. "Akane-chan, of the four of us chasing him..."   
she held up her hand, "...or otherwise engaged to him, do you think   
he sees a marriage partner in any of us? Would he want to marry you,  
at this time? You've already said *you* don't want to marry him --   
yet."  
"Whaddya mean, 'yet'?" I just smiled.  
  
***  
  
"Ran-chan?"  
He was sitting across the grill from me, as I turned over another  
special okonomi-yaki for him to replace the one he was downing like   
a man possessed. He looked up, mouth full.  
"Mmphg?" Oh, Ranma honey...  
"Don't talk with your mouth full, sugar. Swallow, and I'll ask   
you..." An audible gulp.  
"Okay, what is it, Ucchan?"  
"Ran-chan... what do you think of me?"  
"What kinda question is that? You're my best friend, you're a   
great cook, you're always there to listen to me when I needja..."  
"Uh-huh, uh-huh. But would you be willing to marry me?"  
"Erk?!" The poor boy practically choked. Nice going, girl.   
*Reeeeal* subtle.  
"I mean... for a little while?"  
"A... little while? Whaddya mean, Ucchan?"  
"Ranma, hear me out, okay? This may be difficult..."  
  
  
It *was* difficult for Ran-chan to grasp. It seemed that it   
hadn't occurred to him that there might come a time when I wouldn't   
be there anymore for him. I knew how he felt, but pressed on.  
"...so, I thought maybe we can get married. So we can take   
advantage of the time we have together. How about it, Ran-chan?  
Whaddya say?"  
He just stared at me, slack-jawed. I waved my hand in front of   
him. "Ran-chan?"  
"I- you- you mean, you're..."  
"Terminal. Uh-huh. It's gone too far to operate; the docs said   
I should just try and get the most out of the time I had left."  
"Which is...?  
"Six months, a year, tops. I've told Akane, and she's giving me   
her blessing, believe it or not. I told her I'd give you back at the   
end. Assuming..." I winked, "you'll *take* her after you've had me."  
"Uh, well... this is kinda sudden..."  
"Tell me about it. And I still gotta teach Konatsu the ropes   
before I hand the place over to him."  
"Can I get back to you on this?"  
"Take your time, sugar, but give me an answer by tomorrow."  
  
***  
  
It was a simple affair, and quick. As understanding as the Tendos   
and the Saotomes were about this, they weren't going to take their   
chances on the Kunos or Shampoo and her great-grandmother finding   
out. A Western ceremony, in the dojo (Thanks again, Mr. Tendo),   
with Akane at my side as maid of honor.   
As Ranma walked in, she elbowed me in the ribs. "I hope you know  
what you're doing to me, leaving me with used goods," she teased.   
I think she was starting to be envious of me rather than jealous   
of him. A good sign for the future I wouldn't be around to see.  
I figured I might as well play it straight. "Not at all. One   
sign of a good marriage; the one left behind wants to get married   
all over again. You better hope Ran-chan enjoys being married to   
me, so that he'll be rarin' to go for you once I'm gone."  
Her eyes were welling up. Could it be that she was gonna miss   
me? "Oh, Ucchan!" What's a bride to do when her maid of honor   
is crying on her sleeve?  
"Hey, Akane-chan. Take it easy. You're supposed to be *my* moral   
support here."  
The rest of the ceremony was a bit of a blur, although I remember   
Mr. Tendo crying at the minister's line about "as long as you both   
shall live." It's amazing; once everyone knows you're terminal, so   
much is forgiven, even the fact that I'm stealing his daughters'   
promised fiance.  
  
***  
  
Of course, the word I had used before was 'borrowing', not   
'stealing', and it was starting to hit home. The first few weeks   
were absolutely wonderful, as we moved his stuff from the dojo to   
my apartment over the Ucchan. As a lover, he was pretty tentative  
(but hey, aren't we all at first?) -- I had to bop him with my   
spatula once or twice to get him to stop treating me like I was   
some kinda china doll -- but he soon warmed up to the task. Akane,  
I thought, you're gonna be in for a real treat someday.  
The community began to accept me as Ran-chan's wife, too -- many of   
them had expected Akane-chan to win him, so it wasn't as easy as all   
that. I still had to contend with Shampoo sticking her face in the   
Ucchan and trading insults with her, and Kodachi would occasionally   
throw her two yen in as well, but by and large, sympathies were on   
my side. Not that I always appreciated it; bad enough that I had to   
teach Ran-chan not to treat me as if I were falling apart. Trying   
to do the same for all of Nerima was a little more than I could   
manage. But I tried to just take it in stride and enjoy the   
attention.  
But this couldn't last forever, and it didn't. After only a couple   
of months, it got to be very difficult (and very painful) to even get   
up in the mornings. And usually, by the time I was up and about,   
Ranma had left for school. I knew he was probably spending more   
time with Akane than me on some days, but I couldn't resent it.   
After all, I had taken him from her.  
  
***  
  
Besides, I was preoccupied with trying to make sure that the   
Ucchan would survive me, if only for my customers' and Konatsu's   
sakes. During afternoon lulls, while most people were in school   
or at their own jobs, I would scribble down my okonomi-yaki receipes   
as best as I could. I knew that I would have to drill Konatsu   
rigourously to get these right, and found myself staring off into   
space, wondering if I was up to the task.  
It was during these lulls, during one of these daydreams, that he   
appeared. I never heard a thing, not even a rustling of the shop   
curtain as he entered... of course, that could have been due to my   
usual reverie. He practically had to rap on the grill to get my   
attention, but once he did, he had my fullest attention.  
My eyes went wide. "Sir!" I snapped to attention, wincing inwardly   
as I did so. This was my mentor, the old monk who had brought me back   
from my only culinary defeat to thrash my opponent in a rematch. Of   
all the people to be inattentive to...!  
The old man's face broke into a grin. "At ease, my child. I do   
believe you've earned your rest. I've just come to check up on your   
progress.  
"Ne? Progress? Oh! Well..." I was thoroughly flustered, but set   
to mixing up some batter from scratch. Eggs... flour... vegetables...   
spices... meat... The ingredients flew about me, as I worked in a haze.   
But at last, I presented him with the best I could do, and bowed humbly   
to him.  
"I'm so sorry, sensei... I'm afraid my technique has suffered these   
past few months."  
His gaze was sympathetic, reassuring. "As have you, from what I can   
tell. But technique is only part of the puzzle, Ukyou-chan... it is   
the tasting that is the true test."  
He cut a bite off, and popped it in his mouth. His eyes lit up with   
childlike wonder.  
"This is... different. It's mild, sweet..." A smile curled across   
his wrinkled face. "It tastes like angels... dancing on my tongue."  
I brought my hands to my face in a poor attempt to conceal my blush.   
"Angels... dancing?"  
He flashed me a sly smile. "Well... more than dancing, actually.   
I take it you're enjoying married life." Now I was *really* blushing,   
and my hands dropped to my sides. There was no covering *this* up.   
"I see you are. It shows in your work." He took another bite, and   
chewed it slowly, reverently. "It seems a shame to lose this..."  
I dropped my gaze. "So you've heard, then."  
"Why else do you think I would come all the way from Yamanashi   
Prefecture? Just to eat good food? I could do as well for myself   
back at the monestary..." His voice trailed off as he took another   
bite. "Well... almost.  
"There is a peace in your soul that only a few have ever acheived.   
Even I could not match this."  
"Sensei! You can't be serious."  
"I am. You have no regrets in you, nothing you need to accomplish.   
You have this place," he waved his arm around to indicate the Ucchan,   
"and you have -- Ranma, is that his name?"  
I merely nodded.  
"When I was your age, my child, I knew a girl. I thought I might be   
happy with her for the rest of my days. But I never could find the   
courage to actually say so to her... and I lost her. Never mind how...  
it's not that important. It was shortly thereafter that I joined the   
monestary.  
"To this day, I think of her and wonder... what if I had said something?  
Would our lives have been better off?  
"I have these regrets, Ukyou-chan... so I can never quite attain the   
perfection you have with these...  
"Uh... could you make a few more, so that I might be able to share   
these with my fellow monks, my dear?"  
  
***  
  
I was on such a high that day, I sent my mentor home with ten dozen of   
my best okonomi-yaki. But as the time wore on, most days it became all   
I could do to simply drag myself downstairs and help Konatsu with the   
cooking:  
"Just try following the recipe, Konatsu-chan, and everything   
will turn out fine."  
"But Ukyou-sama, you always improvise, and your okonomi-yaki   
always comes out so much better."  
"It's cough not improvisation, Konatsu-chan. I've got a lot   
of experience under my belt. I know which spices go better with   
pork, and which with beef. Fifteen years of koff-koff trial and   
error will get you to that point. We don't have that kind of time.  
Now, here's a list of what works with what..."  
  
As for the business end, Nabiki was helping out there. Even   
helping to teach Konatsu the value of a yen. Of course, that meant   
he eventually started demanding higher wages.  
"Geez, thanks a lot, Nabiki. Even if it is more expensive to run   
the place now, it's nice to know it'll still be running. What do   
I owe ya?"  
"No charge," she'd told me. "Just remember me in your will."  
"All right, how's this: 'To Nabiki Tendo, who was always hinting   
about being remembered in my will: Hi there.'"  
"Very funny."  
"Hey, cough *I* thought it was."  
  
***  
  
Eventually, Konatsu began to take over completely at the Ucchan,   
leaving me with a lot more time to be alone with Ran-chan, enjoying   
each other as best we could. I had the strength to stay behind the   
counter for only short periods of time while my kunoichi was out   
running errands.  
It was during once of his errands that I had one last visitor.   
I poured batter for his okonomi-yaki before I even realized who he was.  
He was much older than I remembered him, but it had been some ten-plus   
years since I'd last seen him. His beard had turned a light grey, and   
his gruff expression had softened a bit; he almost looked worried.   
But he still wore his okonomi-yaki seller's outfit, much like mine.  
My father.  
I set my jaw, and glowered at him. "What are you doing here?"  
He gave me a helpless shrug. There was a small scroll in his hand.   
"Your girlfriend found me and told me about your condition. I had to   
come and see you." Girlfriend? Oh good grief... he was talking about   
Tsubasa. That kid had tracked me down every time I moved; I guess it   
shouldn't surprise me that he could've gone backward and tracked down   
my father. Maybe he thought he was going to be doing me a favor.  
I could've told him otherwise. "Whatever for? I still distinctly   
recall hearing you say 'Tatsuhiro Kuonji *has* no daughter.' I'm just   
some stranger you don't even know, and I *know* you don't care about.   
Why else would you have thrown me out like so much garbage?"  
"Ukyou, I wanted to tell you, but I couldn't find you..."  
"I've been here for several years; it wouldn't have been that hard.   
What do you want from me now, anyway? I don't want you here any more   
than you wanted me then. Get out."  
"But Ukyou..."  
"I said GET OUT!"  
He sighed heavily. "I was afraid it would come to this." He set the   
scroll on the table, and walked to the door. "I was hoping you could   
forgive your foolish old man for what he'd done to you. I'm sorry."  
  
When he had left, I walked over to the table. I picked up the scroll   
gingerly, with two fingers like pincers, and went to throw it out.   
A small slip of paper slipped out and fell to the floor.  
I dropped the scroll immediately, and scooped up the paper. It was   
a haiku in his crabbed handwriting; I hadn't known he did such things:  
  
My dearest daughter  
The Kuonji family honor  
has now been restored.  
  
"My dearest daughter"...?  
I unrolled the scroll. It was a formal reinstatement, as an honoured   
daughter of the Kuonji clan.  
  
I ran out of the restaurant, and was winded by the time I reached   
the door. "Daddy?" I called out.  
But there was no one there. He had long since gone.  
  
And the okonomi-yaki burning on the grill for him was the last one   
I would ever make.  
  
***  
  
Ten months had passed since my death warrant had been signed.   
Nine since the wedding. And now, it had come to this. Lying in   
a hospice bed, just waiting for it all to be over...  
I must look like a skeleton. I hadn't even been able to eat   
an okonomi-yaki for three weeks. They taste okay -- Konatsu's   
learned his lessons well -- I just can't keep anything down.  
I'd decided that enough was enough. If one could will oneself   
to stay alive for a few more days until some special event, I   
figured I could also will myself to shut down. And today was   
the day. Everyone was there, friend and enemy alike. So this   
is what it's like to attend your own funeral, I was thinking.   
Personally, I'd take the wedding bed over the funeral bier anytime.  
But I had to wait for everyone to say their goodbyes. At least I   
could give myself time for that.  
  
Kuno Tatewaki steps forward first. He kisses my hand. A gallant  
to the end, even if he *is* full of himself. "My lady, we have   
known thee so long, and yet not nearly long enough. Nay, an   
eternity is what you deserve..."  
I cut him off. "Eternity is where I'm already going, Kuno."  
"And like the stars of heaven, whose light illumines us long after  
they have ceased to be, so shall you be in our hearts.  
"Thank you, Kuno-chan. Give my best to your sister." He steps   
back and nods.  
A high-pitched voice pipes up. "Even not-nice spatula girl   
deserve better."  
"That's gotta be Shampoo. Don't worry about me, girl. I've had  
the best year of my life with Ran-chan..." I can practically hear   
steam rising from the Chinese girl's head. "Mousse!" I call out.   
"Take care of her, willya? I don't want her corrupting Ran-chan or   
nothin'! cough-cough"  
I can't see him, but I hear him: "Don't worry, Ukyou. I'll take  
good care of Shampoo."  
There is the 'whack' of a staff, and a crotchety old voice snaps  
"I am *not* Ukyou, and you are *not* taking care of Shampoo. Ranma  
will be free to marry Shampoo by tomorrow." General mayhem breaks  
out, as everyone starts clamoring for their piece of Ran-chan.  
"Hey, hey cough Hey! Will you all just SHUT UP! I'm not dead   
*yet*." I gasp out. Oh man, that was too much effort. "Somebody  
get those three out of here! I won't let them ruin my last moments  
on earth, all right?" Mr. Tendo, Mr. Saotome and Kuno bundle them  
off.  
"Hey, girls...?" The Tendo sisters approach. "I don't know how to  
thank you all for your support these past few months. Especially  
you, Akane-chan. You'll do all right for him, you know."  
"I- I- "  
"Oh, Akane-chan. Just open your heart for him. He's a fine   
husband, and I think he'll do pretty well to have you, too."  
Mother-in-law steps forward. "I think that's enough, girls.   
Ukyou needs her rest."  
"Thank you Nodoka. Goodbye."  
"We'll have a shrine built for you in the morning, Ukyou-chan.   
You've been wonderful to Ranma."  
"And he's been wonderful right back." I can practically hear him  
blush. "A shrine's not necessary, though..."  
"Well, who else would build one for you?"  
I hadn't thought of that. I knew Father wouldn't. Konatsu, maybe?   
Tsubasa?  
  
A few tears, and a number of hugs, and the Saotome and Tendo clans  
finally rise to leave. Including Ran-chan.  
"Ran-chan... don't go." He looks over his shoulder at me, then   
calls out the door at the others.  
"Uh... Pop? Mom? Mr. Tendo? Yeah, I'm gonna be a while yet.  
Okay, sure. I'll catch you all later." He walks back over to my   
bedside, and takes my hand.  
"Y'know, Kuno's right. We all knew this was coming, and I'm still  
not ready for it."  
I try to smile. "So you were just gonna walk away, because you   
didn't know what else to do?"  
"Hey!" Defensively, then softer: "Am I really that insensitive?"  
I cock my head, "If the shoe fits, Ran-chan..." He growls slightly.  
"Oh, Ranma honey. I just don't wanna go alone."  
"Alright, Ucchan. I'm here. And I'll stay here until then... if  
that's what you want."  
"More than anything, honey."  
  
In the silence that follows, one last request comes to mind. One  
last thing to take with me into the next world.  
  
"Ran-chan... could you do me a favor?"  
"Uh.. sure. Anything you want, Ucchan."  
"Ran-chan... Could you.. make love to me? One last time?" He   
drops my hand, abruptly.  
"I.. I couldn't do that, Ucchan."  
"And why not? cough, cough"  
"Well.." he fidgets nervously, "you're dying."  
"I'm dying... ha. Ran-chan, that's why we got married in the first  
place. I don't know if you said 'yes' out of pity or real love, but  
I took what I could get. And I wanna thank you for it. But don't   
leave me here. I don't wanna die alone.  
"I don't know who said it, but I once heard that making love was   
'like kicking death in the ass while singing.' And after having you,  
I believe it. And I love it. So if I'm going to die, I don't want   
to go gently. I want to go kicking and singing. And I want to do   
it with you. Please. I know the exertion'll probably kill me, but   
it's the only way I could imagine going."  
He blinks a couple of times. "Is this what you really want, Ucchan?"  
I nod. "You are."  
  
This is it. My final impression of my husband, and his of me. I'm  
sure I have the better view. Naked came I into the world, and naked  
shall I leave it. I just wish I could leave a better-looking corpse.  
If only for his sake. He looks like a god, standing there.  
  
And now... he enters.  
I brace myself. Even with the painkillers, it hurts, and I can't   
keep myself from crying. Ran-chan, the darling, can't help but   
notice. He pauses.  
"Are you okay, Ucchan?"  
What a question. I laugh, even through the pain, even through   
the shortness of breath. "No, of course I'm not, Ran-chan. But   
I love you, and I love it. Please, don't stop now."  
"All right. Hold on, Ucchan! Ungh!"  
  
I want desperately to hold him, to pull his face down to mine  
and kiss him until he's as short of breath as I am. But I can  
hardly move. All I can do is lie here and let him lead. A drop  
of moisture lands on my lip. It's salty... is it sweat? Or a   
teardrop? I look up at my dear Ranma's face, and I cannot tell.  
There is light behind him, and it makes it difficult to make out  
his expression.  
  
He can't hold on much longer -- I can feel it. His thrusts are   
getting faster, more urgent. I am dangling on the precipice.   
Both my strength and resistance are ebbing away. Please, let me   
hold on long enough for him to --  
"Come on - ugh! - Ran-chan. Let - oh! - let it go. Let muh-muh-  
meee gooooo!!" Oh, Lord. Here it comes. The light is getting   
brighter; it's like a halo around him. With a convulsive effort,  
I force my arms up, and wrap them around him. The feel of my hands   
on his back spurs him on.  
"UCCHAN!!" he cries out, and I know he's gone over the edge.   
His warm life force pours into me, even as mine is draining away.   
I can barely see him now for the light shining from behind him.  
"Thank you Ran-chan," I sigh. This is it. I'm on my way, now.  
Good-bye, my darling. Take care of Akane-chan for me. "Thank you   
for ev --"  
  
***  
  
Dedicated to Petra Weiss (in pace requiescat)  



End file.
